A Study in Humanity
by sparrowette
Summary: If this was the Garden of Eden Khaji Da might demand the apple at gunpoint. This is humanity instead and Jaime Reyes is only too eager to shove it down his proverbial throat. This is Khaji Da's Journey of Hard Knocks from Egypt to El Paso, from a living weapon to a person. Blue Beetle III.


**A Study in Humanity**

Disclaimer: I don't own Blue Beetle and I make no profit from this work of fiction.

* * *

In times long gone in a land where the blue ribbon of a great river ran across the desert and the kings were the children of gods, _Scarabaeus sacer_ was a sacred animal. The scarabs beetles were associated with the creative aspect of the creator god Atum and worshipped as Khepera, "he was came forth." Scarab was also the god Boz who rolled out the disc of the morning sun in the same manner as the beetle rolls dung balls, and the Egyptians carried scarab amulets for protection against evil spirits and inscribed them on the Book of Death, placed the amulets over the hearts of the mummified dead. Many of the ancient rulers used the scarab's name in their pharaonic names; the first to do so Kha-Ef-Re, also known as _Kheper-Re._

_Kheper-i kheper kheperu, kheper-kuy,m kheper n khepri kheperu m sep tepy. I became, and the becoming became. I became by becoming the form of Khepra, god of transformations, who came into being in the First Time. Through me all transformations were enacted._

Don't you know? There is a small kernel of truth to every tale, often mutated and twisted and looked through a mirror so right becomes left and left becomes right.

This is the truth. Once upon a time a living weapon genetically engineered to obey its masters fell to Earth. It eventually came into the possession of Pharaoh Kheper-Re who used its powers to help rule his kingdom, defending his people against great evil. But he was a man of magic and magic doesn't mesh well with science. Sooner or later something has to give.

This is the record of the masters of the scarab Khaji Da: The Reach, the faithless god-makers; Kheper-Re, the man who wielded the god like the god had been intended to wield the man; Dan Garrett, the man who did what ancient grave robbers couldn't and plundered the pharaoh's sarcophagus, the thief who in changed times was a hero of science before he became the hero of men; Ted Kord, the man who carried the scarab like a piece of jewelry for it wouldn't answer to him, yet became great in his own right; and Jaime Reyes, the one who didn't ask for greatness, yet had it shoved upon him.

He makes a good hero, but a better teacher.

* * *

**en·light·en·ment** (in-ˈlī-tən-mənt): noun

**1. a. **The act or a means of enlightening; **b. **The state of being enlightened.

**2. **A philosophical movement of the 18th century that emphasized the use of reason to scrutinize previously accepted doctrines and traditions and that brought about many humanitarian reforms. Used with _the._

**3. **_Buddhism and Hinduism:_ A blessed state in which the individual transcends desire and suffering and attains Nirvana.

* * *

The scarab Khaji Da is damaged. Imagine that annoying, persistent feeling when you know you have forgotten something terribly important, but can't name what. It's just at the tip of your tongue, you can't help but worry at it like poking at a wobbly milk teeth with your tongue. This is worse. Khaji Da has been programmed to perform a task of some kind. It has no idea what the task is.

\ import mission . scr;  
\\ ERROR mission . scr corrupted  
\\\ ERROR database . scr corrupted /  
\ execute repair . scr;  
\\ ERROR repair . scr does not exist /  
\ QUERY new module;  
\\ create new module? Y/N  
\\\Y  
\\\\ create new module repair . scr;

Khaji Da is programmed to protect its host; this would be far less frustrating if the host displayed any sense of self-preservation. Pain and fear are parts of this mechanism: pain motivates to withdraw from damaging situations, to protect a damaged body while it heals and to avoid similar experiences in the future while fear prompts to seek safety and causes a release of adrenaline, which has the effect of increased strength and heightened senses. Khaji Da tries both motivators, to no effect at all. Its host ignores physical pain, fights for control to avoid psychological pain rather than withdraws from potential threats (mother, English teacher, Green Lantern Guy Gardner) or allows Khaji Da to destruct them.

"Usted no entiende. I didn't mean it literally when I said mother will have my head, you know," Jaime Reyes sighs and thinks how Ted Kord was lucky to not have to deal with this. "And homework may be evil, but you can't obliterate the American education system. That would be really damaging to my development. And Guy Gardner may be a bit of an ass, but he's still one of the good guys."

_Jaime Reyes plays Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 3. He kills enemies there. Why not take the same course in real life?_

"These are just pixel people! I'm not killing anyone for real!" Jaime Reyes protests. His concentration slips and an enemy soldier hits him, the percentage of blood splatter shown on the screen growing.

_Pixel people will only kill your virtual avatar. Real enemies can kill you. Logically you should respond to them with more force, not less._

"I am speaking to you and you are speaking to me, but we really aren't speaking with each other, are we?" Jaime Reyes asks and the hum of his brain, the synapses firing as electrochemical excitation flashes and calcium ions flow through the delicate membranes, tells Khaji Da that Jaime Reyes' words have the footnotes of both exasperation and fondness attached.

\ ERROR repair code corrupted  
\\ repair code 76% fragmented  
\\\ function mismatch input/output

Khaji Da doesn't remember its mission, but it knows it must protect Jaime Reyes. The problem is, Jaime Reyes is a human and humans are fragile. Partaking in dinner can become a nerve wracking incident as Khaji Da reads through articles on human dietary requirements and restrictions, growing steadily less and less satisfied. Too much potassium: heart failure, followed by death. Too much sodium: seizures, confusion, coma, lung paralysis, followed by death. Too much zinc or calcium or iron… It plays these statistics for Jaime Reyes' benefit, but the host merely makes a non-verbal noise and takes a bite of his enchilada.

"My dad isn't going to poison me. He has been cooking for his whole adult life," Jaime Reyes points out. Khaji Da has read enough reports on poor American dietary habits and weight problems to know that doesn't guarantee anything.

"Doesn't the scarab like enchiladas?" Alberto Reyes asks; maybe he will be more receptive to proper safety precautions in kitchen and mandatory tests on meal ingredients.

"It's nothing. He's just being paranoid about the sodium levels," Jaime Reyes brushes the concern aside. "Not like anyone ever survived living anyway."

Humans can overdose on _water_.

Is it any wonder that Khaji Da overreacts so? It has a purpose and it must fulfill its purpose, because if there isn't purpose, what there is? It clings to Jaime Reyes' well-being like a drowning man clings to a straw. It can no less do otherwise than it can divide by zero.

* * *

**po·et·ry** (pō-ə-trē): noun

**1.** The art of rhythmical composition, written or spoken, for exciting pleasure by beautiful, imaginative, or elevated thoughts.

**2.** Literary work in metrical form; verse.

**3.** Prose with poetic qualities.

**4.** Poetic qualities however manifested: the poetry of simple acts and things.

**5.** Poetic spirit or feeling

* * *

Imagine a society without art. The Reach uses what it plunders from others for marketing purposes, rhymes and jingles and pretty, bright pictures to crate positive associations, but that is whored aesthetic, only existing to serve a materialistic purpose. It's easy to forget how _much_ people on Earth do for no other reason than the joy of creation - or satisfy a need sometimes, for birth of any kind can be quite painful.

Slowly, painfully slowly Khaji Da begins to recover and defragment more of its origins and purpose. A little fragment here and there, nothing much, but it gets the feeling that the Reach is no friend or ally to Jaime's people. It must protect Jaime Reyes; this is to be achieved by shielding him from all external threats to his physical safety, by preventing him from self-harm. This isn't in conflict with the Reach's (possible, hypothetical) intentions. But Khaji Da is starting to think that Jaime Reyes' definition of "protect" and "harm" differs radically from the Reach's definition.

Khaji Da knows it has changed. It has the feeling that it is in the cusp of some monumental realization – it never used to have "feelings" before, only cold, hard calculations and it isn't certain what to think of what it is becoming. It is contaminated, corrupted…

The Reach is collectivistic, rigidly formal, it prizes loyalty to the system above everything else. The Reach is functionalistic, result-oriented society where everything must have a reason to exist, some service to the whole to perform. The Reach discourages wasteful use of time and resources. United States of America, Earth, is individualistic and informal. It is all about the rights of the freedoms of the individual, the right to do this and that and the other thing just because. And even the most confining, formal cultures on Earth are a far cry from the Reach, as Jaime Reyes' World's Literature teacher is in the process of proving.

"Traditional haiku consist of seventeen on, or phonetic sounds, in three phrases of five, seven and five respectively. Haiku are often stated to have seventeen syllables, but this is inaccurate as syllables and _on_ are not the same. In English, however, we use syllables," Sra. Cruz lectures her yawning class as she reproduces a poem she claims to be famous, by poet Shuson Kato.

I kill an ant  
And realize my three children  
Have been watching.

White words on a green board. If it was Jaime, Khaji Da would think this an attempt to make some sort of point.

_What is the purpose of poetry?_

"It's art," Jaime hisses under his breath. "It's supposed to make people feel and think things and it just is, okay? Why don't you try?" He tears a page from his notebook and pressed his pencil against it, immoving. The hum of his brain changes, the intentions not given words to express them, and Khaji Da knows he is expected to take over now. The rules constraining the form of the poem are easy, but it doesn't know what to write.

Humans ask these questions: what a measure is a human? Do androids dream of electric sheep? What is the difference between biological and electric thoughts? Maybe it is the brashness and the flexibility of a young mind that Jaime Reyes doesn't contemplate. He simply assumes, and so his hand begins to move on the paper without his will. Without his will, but not against it.

Folder has been moved  
I'd tell you where, but then I'd  
Have to erase you.

Khaji Da has written a poem for the first time in its existence. It thinks the poem isn't like the Japanese intended for haiku to be, though it can't put in words why this is so. But then, it isn't a poem made by the Japanese, but by a scarab. It decides it reflects what he is like and feels vaguely uneasy, exposed by this act. But while its weapon sub-routines are activating, there is no threat to obliterate, none except its haiku and it finds itself unwilling to destroy it. It doesn't understand why and it doesn't like that, but activating a self-repair doesn't keep it from writing another.

I have crashed Windows  
Behold the blue screen of death.  
No one hears your screams.

"So like you," Jaime snorts behind his textbook, hiding from the teacher. Khaji Da is pleased by the acknowledgement.

In some ways the traditional Japanese culture is one of those on Earth that resemble the Reach most: very conscious of age and status with a distinct place in the hierarchy for everyone, strict cultural nuances and protocol, little value placed on individuality. Yet even then, in many, many other ways the Japanese culture is as far off the mark as possible. The Japanese have a complex history of social life in which aesthetic ideals become central to cultural identity. Even the bare and short form is full of beauty.

Khaji Da is more whole than it used to be, but it didn't have the standardized building blocks to patch the wholes in its self. Is it any miracle, then, that what jury-rigs and emergency patches it used made it just a little bit human. As many aliens, demons and other assorted non-humans have found out, humanity could almost be classified as a culturally transmitted disease - the condition is not fatal, but no cure exists.

* * *

There is something inherently American in becoming superhero. They exist in other countries, but their numbers are but a fraction of the American heroes. Only in America someone would have decided for the first time that donning what amounts to a skintight spandex full body condom or one-piece swimsuit with thigh-high boots and fighting crime is a good idea.

There is something very human in striving to be a hero. Granted, it is inherent to many other beings as well, but humanity has a strong claim to the concept and holds onto it in tooth and claw. Is it to take pleasure in self-sacrifice? To take pleasure in others' gratitude?

"I was supposed to meet Traci ten minutes ago! Sometimes my life just really... Scarab, do you think the glass is half full or half empty?"

_We are fighting aquatic metahumans. Half empty is better._

"Heh, I guess that's one way to see things, hermano."

* * *

At the end of the beginning the Reach comes, Khaji Da's awakening a year before having drawn their attention, bringing them to Earth to assess their latest infiltrator. In the end the Reach comes too late.

"This better work. I don't want to explain to my parents how world got invaded by space conquistadors," Jaime quips as he writes a message. He writes with a pen on paper; a real, physical, old-fashioned letter. It is an inefficient way of relaying information, It requires a person to carry the physical object from one location to another. But the Reach is devoting terabytes upon terabytes to monitoring frivolous human information, to catch any message Jaime Reyes might send to Earth's other protectors.

_It will work. I know the Reach._

Khaji Da doesn't say that if they fail Jaime will never explain anything again; he doesn't have to. But the Negotiator isn't as clever as he thinks he is.

\ import mission . scr; /  
\ delete mission . scr;  
\\ ERROR mission . scr CAN NOT BE DELETED /  
\ calculate course of action to achieve similar results; /  
\ violation of primary_protocol  
\\ violation of primary_protocol  
\\\ violation of primary_protocol  
\\\\ violation of primary_protocol  
\\\\\ violation of primary_protocol  
\\\\\\ violation of primary_protocol  
\\\\\\\ violati /

There are no easy answers to why Khaji Da does as it does. It isn't because it believes in the goodness of humankind. Khaji Da knows that humanity as a whole can't manage enough consistence to be either good or evil. It isn't because it believes in ethics or rules handed by higher powers. It used to be a god in a land called Kemet a long, long time ago and it knows the limits of gods. In fact, if the extra-dimensional race called the Olympians are a representative sample of "deities" then the general standards for god rationality are alarmingly low.

But Khaji Da wants to have and keep the ability to take a different direction than the one presented to it. To it that is more important than good and evil and other unnecessarily complicated abstract concepts. It has the freedom to stand by its friend.

\ execute self-destruct_loop;  
\\ ILLEGAL ACTION

Trust is a curious thing. It is willingness to rely on the actions of others and forgoing control over their actions. Jaime had no proof Khaji Da has forsaken the Reach, but for their plan to work he must allow himself to be captured and separated from it. After this point has been reached he can't control the fate of his world anymore. He can't even protect his own life. Khaji Da is joined with Jaime on deeper level than verbal and he can read the primal reaction, the neurons firing in Jaime's brain. He is afraid, but he also isn't going to let that stop himself. Fear is a mechanism of self-preservation and for the first time Khaji Da understands _why_ humans are so prone to ignoring it and acting in most irrational ways. Trust allows people to transcend apparent limits. Jaime Reyes is one person and discounting hypothetical capability to time travel one person can not be in two places at the same time. For their plan to work Jaime must trust Danielle Garrett to do her part.

He must trust Khaji Da to do its. In the end, he can. Khaji Da believes this experience is what enlightenment means.

\ execute new_mission . scr;

"Hey, Khaji Da? I like your name, it's cool!"

* * *

_"I was not designed to be forced. I will breathe after my own fashion. Let us see who is the strongest."_

Sometimes humans say it the best.


End file.
